<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8" standalone="yes"?><oembed><version><![CDATA[1.0]]></version><provider_name><![CDATA[evolutionistx]]></provider_name><provider_url><![CDATA[https://evolutionistx.wordpress.com]]></provider_url><author_name><![CDATA[evolutiontheorist]]></author_name><author_url><![CDATA[https://evolutionistx.wordpress.com/author/evolutiontheorist/]]></author_url><title><![CDATA[Judging the gift by its cover: contents don&#8217;t&nbsp;matter]]></title><type><![CDATA[link]]></type><html><![CDATA[<p>In my continuing quest to understand American gift-giving norms, I decided to test, (albeit informally,) my theory that the wrapping paper matters more than the present. Not that you can just give total crap and get away with it, (&#8220;Why is there a moldy shoe in this box?&#8221;) but that a mediocre gift paired with nice presentation will be appreciated more than a nice gift with bad presentation.</p>
<p>In the past, I have put a lot of (somewhat sporadic) effort into gifts, without feeling like they were much appreciated. I don&#8217;t mean that I received inadequate ego-stroking praise; I mean that I collected seedpods on a nearby mountain to grow flowers to give to a relative, and then when I returned again to their house, pot and flowers were gone and I never received so much as a thank you. Heck, I&#8217;ve been groused at because large, hand-crafted items arrived a week late because the months spent on them ran over by a few days.</p>
<p>You might say &#8220;fuck them,&#8221; but family is something I have to deal with, whether I want to or not.</p>
<p>Was it the dirty flowerpot? My habitual lateness?</p>
<p>So this time, I grabbed a mediocre item I happened to have lying around and didn&#8217;t want, and that the recipient already had. It&#8217;s not a terrible item&#8211;it&#8217;s in good enough condition to still fit the gift category. Ten minutes before time to go, I hauled out the craft supplies and wrapped it up. (I can wrap anything, including soccer balls. I suspect it&#8217;s a side effect of being good at mentally rotating objects.) The net effect of ribbons and bows and paper and sparkles looked pretty darn good&#8211;much better than my usual technique of wrapping things in newspaper.</p>
<p>And success! Gift was actually appreciated (I even received a thank you.)</p>
<p>From now on, I am not trying so damn hard.</p>
]]></html></oembed>