<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8" standalone="yes"?><oembed><version><![CDATA[1.0]]></version><provider_name><![CDATA[Ballastexistenz]]></provider_name><provider_url><![CDATA[https://ballastexistenz.wordpress.com]]></provider_url><author_name><![CDATA[Mel Baggs]]></author_name><author_url><![CDATA[https://ballastexistenz.wordpress.com/author/ameliabaggs/]]></author_url><title><![CDATA[&#8220;We won&#8217;t help you until you stop acting like you&#8217;re in&nbsp;pain.&#8221;]]></title><type><![CDATA[link]]></type><html><![CDATA[<p>Last night I engaged in a very interesting conversation with a guy who works at the service that helps me out at night.</p>
<p>I was in a lot of pain.  By a lot of pain, I mean I was crying and periodically screaming.  I don&#8217;t cry from pain usually.  I didn&#8217;t cry when my gallbladder was well into emergency stage, I just went really quiet.  If I&#8217;m crying from pain, it&#8217;s <em>serious</em>.  And this pain (and related movement restrictions) was serious enough that a spinal tap was done when I finally did get to the emergency room, because it sounded to them a lot like meningitis.  (Fortunately it wasn&#8217;t.)</p>
<p>Anyway, I was sitting there trying to string sentences together, while barely able to keep auditory comprehension going, and trying to push through all the pain-induced shutdown to actually talk to the guy.  And I&#8217;d periodically get the wording wrong or scream in half-pain half-linguistic-frustration or accidentally interrupt him.  He told me that he would not help me until I was able to &#8220;respect&#8221; him the way he &#8220;respected&#8221; me.</p>
<p>You know&#8230; usually, if, for instance, someone&#8217;s finger&#8217;s cut off, and they&#8217;re running around cussing and screaming and not being very polite, other people kind of grasp why they&#8217;re acting like that and don&#8217;t act like the person is being disrespectful on purpose.  Somehow, if the person has some kind of disability label however, this becomes a &#8220;behavior problem&#8221;.   I used to know a guy who went untreated for pain for years, with a dislocated hip, because he had a developmental disability and all the things he did because of the pain were considered &#8220;bad behavior&#8221;.  They didn&#8217;t bother looking to see if he was in pain.  Hint:  Physical pain isn&#8217;t behavioral, and treating it as behavioral is a violation of our rights.</p>
<p>(And if I&#8217;m not tending to my blog enough, now you know part of the reason.  Sorry about that.)</p>
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