Based on recent trends, or maybe just what I’ve noticed,  I think the human body seems to naturally shut down around 3 pm. I assume most people, like me have finished their really important work by 10 am, had lunch by 12 or 1 pm and are just biding their time until 5 pm. For some reason, 3 pm is just that time of day where you are just ready to shut it down for the day. Blame biology or the many years you spent in school getting out around 3 pm or just plain laziness, but commercials and studies and energy drinks have figured out that 3 pm is the magical time when people sleep with their eyes open.

There is a commercial that came out recently for one of those healthy nut, cheese and cranberry combos that claims they combat the 3 PM crash, but my co-workers and I laughed that off.  I’m thinking you need something a little stronger than a wedge of cheese and few nuts to combat the 3 PM slide. I think the solution is not fighting it, but just taking a nap on the couch…for about two hours. Just in time to go home.

Now let’s get to the real nuts and cranberries of why we are here. Behold, the Bitter Friday Giftures.

This is just literally…

…a sleepy crash.

Then there is when you crash so hard…

…you fall into a secret passage.

Then there is the subtle…

…I’m going home right now crash.

This is what the 3 PM crash…

…feels like.

As soon as you get home…

..from work.

That feeling you get…

…right when you boss decides to walk by.

Possibly the only reason…

…you can really power through.

I’m a big fan…

…of this move.

This is me…

…at some boring awards banquet.

Definitely me…

…when someone asks me to work late.

This is my co-workers…

…when they know I’m falling asleep.

And this, of course…

…is when I’m wide awake.

A quick suggestion for you, before you reach the 3 PM crash. Don’t, I repeat, don’t read this blog as it will surely put you to sleep with its dull words and its mezmorising gifs that will quickly lull you to sleep. Perhaps it might also help to get one of those pairs of glasses that make it look like your eyes are open. That is your only hope.

ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH

Bitter 3 PM Crash Ben