Owner’s manual’s seem to come with everything. You get them for TV’s and vacuum’s and cars and camera’s. Some people love them and some hate them. Some people devour them as soon as they open the item, while some immediately trash them. Some are incredibly long and some barely have a quarter of a page.

I know for a fact that I haven’t perused more than a page or two of my car instruction manual in the 12 years I’ve had the car. On the other hand, I opened my camera, looked at it for a bit and then read most of the manual that same day. What is it about instruction manuals that either turn us off or make us want to read them?

And even more importantly, why didn’t we get one for the most important thing ever? Our lives? Why didn’t we get an instruction manual on us when we turned 5? Or whatever age it was when we started to read and understand things?

And for that matter, how many of us would even read the manual, especially if it was 500 pages? Would we just skim the manual or would we read it more in depth? So many questions.

In the end, who cares? How about we just get into the Bitter Friday Giftures…

Who is good…

…at following instructions anyways?

I think most people would…

…just try to learn the basics.

While others would try to…

…devour them.

Sometimes…

…we ask my son to vacuum his room.

Or..

…make his bed.

Or just put away…

…a dish.

Not only does he…

…ignore us…

But he’s not even…

…sorry about it.

He likes to pretend…

…that he did’t hear us.

Or that…

…it was somebody else’s fault.

Either way…

…we see right through his excuses…

And he gets shocked…

…when we take away his Xbox.

The best revenge we can get is having a grandson that will treat his instruction manual like he treated his and will give him just as much trouble as he gave us. Because living bitter is the best revenge.

ARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH

Bitter Instruction Manual Ben