Oh-oh! As if I needed yet another way to mess up my credit rating! Now, they are rolling out Coke machines that take credit cards! The way I drink Coke, this is a path to sure bankrupcy!
I always wanted to install a sink in my kitchen with three faucets: cold water, hot water and cold Coke, piped in straight from the nearest Coke factory. As much Coke as I have consumed to date, the CocaCola company should just provide me with free Coke (and free delivery) for the rest of my life – I deserve it – I singlehandedly kept their company afloat over all these years. Thus, there is no need to install a Cokemeter for my third faucet….

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