Half of young children are anxious about the effects of global warming, often losing sleep because of their concern, according to a new report today.

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“While many adults may look the other way, this study should show that global warming is not only hurting the children of the future, it’s affecting the welfare of kids now.

No, you moron. The irrational fear of global warming, placed in their young skulls by putative adults, is what is affecting the welfare of kids now.

There’s a monster on the loose, and his name is Ad Baculum.