It’s not as easy as you think

E3: It’s just a really, really big video game convention.

Wrong.

There is knowledge that is only accessible to the 1%, the media elite, those who have been going to E3 since before their stubby fingers could span WASD.

“Simone, no one’s hands are that small,” you say. “Not even babies. If you stretched a baby’s fingers out, it could probably cover those keys and therefore you could use a baby’s hand to play a PC game which uses WASD for movement.”

Wrong again. Try expanding your mind instead of that baby’s fingers.

Anyway, we have survival tips that could turn your E3 from a lose-fest into a cruise-fest, as you blast through lines, play all the video games, and protect your physical and mental health from the terrible, terrible impact of being around other human beings.

Watch this video to learn how to do it right next time.

If you liked that, there are lots of other videos in a place called “our YouTube channel,” and here’s a playlist where you can watch all of our E3 2017 #content:

Source: Polygon – Full