CH,

When am I going to give up the struggle in my heart and just accept that you are the source of all knowledge?

dein kampf.

I’ve been commenting on your posts for awhile – recently about my adventures on Tinder as a married man. I had a girl lined up this weekend, and she was ready to go… until her mom called from across the country and it fell apart. We texted a bit the next day, and it trailed off.

Sitting here today, and I go through the CH archives and come across your advice for reversing a flake. I figured, what do I have to lose? I edited a bit cause I know she’s Jewish, and texted her “what’s up, flaky flakeberg?” Got three texts back in under two minutes.

Honestly, my schedule is complicated since I have a wife to work around, so I doubt she and I will be able to connect again. But hey, I got a response, and a few more dirty pictures to add to my collection. And you can’t put a price on that, can you?

Thanks again,

[WHOO BOY YOU BET THE NAME IS REDACTED]

Folks, I am but a humble messenger of the True Nature of Woman. Sup from my banquet of knowledge at your own risk, and prepare to receive the shwings and furrows of indignant tradcons.