<![CDATA[How To Recover From A Brutally Public Friendzoning]]>

Oh no. This man was just put in the friend zone on national television. pic.twitter.com/dtbHj3P9fN

— Barstool Sports (@barstoolsports) April 27, 2018

An experienced man would never find himself in this situation, but most men aren’t experienced with women, so they are easily victimized by emotional and resource objectifying women who use them for attention and gibs without having to provide sexual release in return.

Some say the video is staged; I don’t think so. Both of their reactions seem spontaneous and authentic to their sex (the female recklessly indulges cruelty and the male is surprised his ardor isn’t reciprocated). We’ll proceed as if the clip is the real deal.

Right after she cackles murderously and chirps “we’re friends!”, you can see the moment that her poison-tipped shiv strikes beta ventricle (around 0:07). It looks like this:

At 0:16 our soulkilled beta tries the “It’s complicated” line (maybe he read about its usefulness at a PUA blog?), but it falls flat because the context was all wrong (it can’t be used effectively after one is freshly castrated) and the girl nonetheless yammers incessantly over the top of his voice, “I’m single. I’m single guys. I’m single”.

She had to remind the pool of alpha males in the studio audience THREE TIMES that she’s single. This wrecked herbling went SIX MONTHS thinking he and her were an item. You see, it’s all fun and games for the beta orbiter-exploiting cutie until the day comes her obedient pet gets uppity and publicly airs his romantic assumptions. Whoa, big fella! she thinks, curb your enthusiasm! And that’s her cue to publicly shear the last wispy locks of his manhood.

Those eggs won’t tolerate the slightest incursions by beta orbiter seed. Impudence like that must be snuffed in the crib, before a REALLY awkward scene erupts and he cockblocks a jerkboy she wants to meet.

At 0:19, our defenestrated beta can’t sustain the grinning rictus concealing his shredded dignity any longer and the already transparent mask slips completely off. “What?!”, he yelps, anguished.

Maybe she finally notices the hurt on his face, because she jumps in to console him…by reminding everyone again “oh no no, we’re really good friends”, as if saying it the tenth time will somehow make the castrati oil go down easier. After all, what man wouldn’t love her for a friend? She’s teh awesome (vagina not included)! And then to punctuate her compassion, please note at 0:22 the little shove she gives to his shoulders, pushing his incompetent seed away from her golden eggs.

He looks back at her forlornly, and all she can do is break into tension-relieving laughter. What’s so funny? Well, his humiliation for one. The audience’s groan, for another. But mostly a girl will laugh like this, after neutering a man with a chainsaw, to sonically disrupt the rapidly emerging narrative of her cruelty in the hopes that observers will agree to her new implied narrative that the ordeal is all a light-hearted joke between friends. Girls have to walk a tightrope when disabling insolent beta orbiters in public; they have to simultaneously disabuse the orbiter of his presumption AND prevent her social ostracism by onlookers who will naturally feel sympathetic toward the orbiter.

I can’t blame the girl. This beta set the bitch up. She was cornered. She had to move against him. It’s so typical of mincing passive betaboys to wait for claustrophobic moments to make their move, like when the girl is trapped in an elevator or on a TV game show. If I were this cute girl, on reflection I’d be pissed.

But it takes two to tango. One exploitative minx, and one willing-to-be-exploited beta. He pounces when (he thinks) she’s most defenseless; she leads him on for months when he’s most defenseless. Nobody comes out a winner here. The sadist requires the masochist. The dom the sub.

Returning to the title of this post, the best way to recover from a brutally public friendzoning is a cheeky interpretation of the Game tactics ASSUME THE SALE and AGREE & AMPLIFY.

HER: shiv shiv shiv shiv shiva destroyer of socially retarded blue balled beta orbiters *tee hee*

To pull this off our insipid beta would need Supreme Gentleman levels of state control, and a practiced shit-eating grin. But let’s face it, there aren’t many ways to salvage an LJBF blowout this catastrophic. To get the right Inner Game for such a salvage operation, our beta male would have had to have multiple HB6s-and-above plates in rotation to prevent the ramifications we see here from his having oneitis for this Cruella de Filly.

That would be pretty funny, and it would totally restore his dignity imo, and put a little egg on her face as a bonus.

I can’t believe I missed that part. So she knows he wants to fuck her, but she’s so cruel and selfish she doesn’t give a shit about his unrequited lust and will continue using him for the asexual orbiter gibs.