<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8" standalone="yes"?><oembed><version><![CDATA[1.0]]></version><provider_name><![CDATA[Jumped The Snark]]></provider_name><provider_url><![CDATA[http://jumpedthesnark.com]]></provider_url><author_name><![CDATA[skeim01]]></author_name><author_url><![CDATA[https://jumpedthesnark.com/author/skeim01/]]></author_url><title><![CDATA[The Regis Philbin Wave of Mutilation&nbsp;Continues]]></title><type><![CDATA[link]]></type><html><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.nypost.com/t/Jon_Gosselin"><img class="alignright" title="Regis Gosselin" src="https://i1.wp.com/cache.daylife.com/imageserve/07999VX2sXeDz/610x.jpg" alt="" width="251" height="166" /></a>Last week the Regis Philbin runaway train <a href="http://jumpedthesnark.com/2009/11/18/reege-no-longer-just-a-danger-to-himself-nearly-gives-meryl-streep-heart-attack/" target="_blank">barreled through Meryl Streep</a>, nearly sending her into cardiac arrest when Reege mistakenly informed Streep that her daughter had broken her leg (Just a little error reading the cue card.  NBD.  She&#8217;s only the daughter of Oscar Royalty.  Relaaaaax).</p>
<p>Now Reege has once again turned the knife onto himself, as he&#8217;ll <a href="http://news-briefs.ew.com/2009/11/23/regis-philbin-announces-leave-of-absence-from-live-with-regis-and-kelly/" target="_blank">undergo hip replacement surgery</a> on December 1, followed by a four to six-week recovery and absence from <a href="http://bventertainment.go.com/tv/buenavista/regisandkelly/gallery.html" target="_blank"><em></em></a><em><a href="http://bventertainment.go.com/tv/buenavista/regisandkelly/index.html" target="_blank">Live!</a> </em></p>
<p>And now I feel kinda bad.  Like it was our constant warnings that Reege is a loose cannon and is a danger to himself and others that caused the need surgery.  Can&#8217;t help but feel somewhat responsible.</p>
<p>Plus, it&#8217;s boring without Reege.  Now I&#8217;ll have no reason to tune into the show.  Unless, of course, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xsj6dzKg6ZQ" target="_blank">Anderson Cooper guest hosts</a>, because that guy goes <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fp67geuhJM" target="_blank">Eddie  Murphy Raw</a> when he&#8217;s freed from the shackles of prime time cable news into the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aE695AfeOI&amp;feature=player_embedded" target="_blank">anything goes</a> of world of syndicated morning television.  No other CNN personality with evidently limited knowledge of popular culture can <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cAqW4W9yV0A" target="_blank">eviscerate the Lohan family</a> like Anderson Cooper.</p>
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