<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8" standalone="yes"?><oembed><version><![CDATA[1.0]]></version><provider_name><![CDATA[Jumped The Snark]]></provider_name><provider_url><![CDATA[http://jumpedthesnark.com]]></provider_url><author_name><![CDATA[skeim01]]></author_name><author_url><![CDATA[https://jumpedthesnark.com/author/skeim01/]]></author_url><title><![CDATA[Entertainment Weekly, You Can Consider My Praise Officially&nbsp;Rescinded]]></title><type><![CDATA[link]]></type><html><![CDATA[<p>A few weeks back <a href="http://jumpedthesnark.com/2009/12/01/congratulations-entertainment-weekly-you-did-it/" target="_blank">I noted</a> that the cover of <a href="http://www.ew.com/ew/inside/issue/0,,ewTax:1078,00.html" target="_blank"><em>Entertainment Weekly</em>&#8216;s annual tribute issue</a>, a look back on all those we &#8220;loved&#8221; and lost this year, made me feel incredibly mortal and guilty for somehow evading <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3gFIDiBq0E" target="_blank">Death&#8217;s</a> clutches in 2009.  I did, however, look on the bright side and commend <em>EW</em> for at least not going with yet another <em>Twilight</em> cover.  It still stings to see Bea Arthur&#8217;s face, but it was preferable to Robert Pattinson&#8217;s bird nest for a week.</p>
<p>BUT!!!  As it turns out the issue I received was the subscriber edition and, unbeknownst to me, there were special collector&#8217;s editions on newsstands that featured, you guessed it, the cast of <em>Twilight</em>.  And not one special cover, but <em>three</em>.  Because apparently if you don&#8217;t get <em>Entertainment Weekly</em> delivered to your house you don&#8217;t care that Patrick Swayze died this year.</p>
<p><a href="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg"><img loading="lazy" data-attachment-id="1149" data-permalink="https://jumpedthesnark.com/2009/12/21/entertainment-weekly-you-can-consider-my-praise-officially-rescinded/robert-pattinson/" data-orig-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg" data-orig-size="500,672" data-comments-opened="1" data-image-meta="{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}" data-image-title="Robert Pattinson" data-image-description="" data-medium-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg?w=223" data-large-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg?w=500" class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-1149" title="Robert Pattinson" src="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg?w=223&#038;h=300" alt="" width="223" height="300" srcset="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg?w=223&amp;h=300 223w, https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg?w=446&amp;h=600 446w, https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/robert-pattinson.jpg?w=112&amp;h=150 112w" sizes="(max-width: 223px) 100vw, 223px" /></a><a href="http://twilightguide.com/tg/2009/11/25/entertainment-weekly-twilight-collector-covers/"><img loading="lazy" data-attachment-id="1150" data-permalink="https://jumpedthesnark.com/2009/12/21/entertainment-weekly-you-can-consider-my-praise-officially-rescinded/kristin-stewart/" data-orig-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/kristin-stewart.jpg" data-orig-size="500,672" data-comments-opened="1" data-image-meta="{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}" data-image-title="Kristin Stewart" data-image-description="" data-medium-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/kristin-stewart.jpg?w=223" data-large-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/kristin-stewart.jpg?w=500" class="size-medium wp-image-1150    alignleft" title="Kristin Stewart" src="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/kristin-stewart.jpg?w=223&#038;h=300" alt="" width="223" height="300" srcset="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/kristin-stewart.jpg?w=223&amp;h=300 223w, https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/kristin-stewart.jpg?w=446&amp;h=600 446w, https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/kristin-stewart.jpg?w=112&amp;h=150 112w" sizes="(max-width: 223px) 100vw, 223px" /></a></p>
<p><a href="http://twilightguide.com/tg/2009/11/25/entertainment-weekly-twilight-collector-covers/"><img loading="lazy" data-attachment-id="1151" data-permalink="https://jumpedthesnark.com/2009/12/21/entertainment-weekly-you-can-consider-my-praise-officially-rescinded/lautner/" data-orig-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/lautner.jpg" data-orig-size="500,669" data-comments-opened="1" data-image-meta="{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}" data-image-title="Lautner" data-image-description="" data-medium-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/lautner.jpg?w=224" data-large-file="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/lautner.jpg?w=500" class="size-medium wp-image-1151 alignnone" title="Lautner" src="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/lautner.jpg?w=224&#038;h=300" alt="" width="224" height="300" srcset="https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/lautner.jpg?w=224&amp;h=300 224w, https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/lautner.jpg?w=448&amp;h=600 448w, https://jumpedthesnark.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/lautner.jpg?w=112&amp;h=150 112w" sizes="(max-width: 224px) 100vw, 224px" /></a></p>
<p>A word of warning to Taylor Lautner: don&#8217;t you dare try to out-hair touch Kristen Stewart.  She will <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vlQd9w0w_4" target="_blank">destroy</a> you in that game.</p>
<p>And, for the record, I&#8217;m firmly on <a href="http://thehumansaredead.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/bea_arthur.jpg" target="_blank">Team Bea</a>.</p>
<p><em>EW</em> did get one thing right in this issue, however: #9 on their &#8220;<a href="http://www.ew.com/ew/gallery/0,,20310286_20323037_6,00.html" target="_blank">Must List</a>,&#8221; <a href="http://myparentswereawesome.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">My Parents Were Awesome</a>.  This site was created by our good friend <a href="http://eliotglazer.com/" target="_blank">Eliot Glazer</a>, and is a wonderful window into the past lives of our parents and grandparents.  Did you know they were cool once?  Yeah, I know, hard to believe, but apparently true.  At the very least they definitely had mustaches (well, just the dudes.  Mostly).</p>
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