<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8" standalone="yes"?><oembed><version><![CDATA[1.0]]></version><provider_name><![CDATA[shape+colour]]></provider_name><provider_url><![CDATA[https://shapeandcolour.wordpress.com]]></provider_url><author_name><![CDATA[Jeremy]]></author_name><author_url><![CDATA[https://shapeandcolour.wordpress.com/author/shapeandcolour/]]></author_url><title><![CDATA[equinox fitness: &#8220;happily ever&#8221; = hornily&nbsp;ever.]]></title><type><![CDATA[link]]></type><html><![CDATA[<p>There may have been a time when going to a gym had something to do with balance or lowering your bad cholesterol or something equally boring. Equinox Fitness, a high-end American fitness chain, has grabbed the bull by the horns with advertising that sticks to the facts. People don&#8217;t go to the gym to feel &#8220;healthy&#8221;&#8230; they go to the gym to hopefully dress up in Victorian gowns and eat grapes off the stomach of a blonde, yoga-buffed male model wearing gold lamé booty shorts.</p>
<p>Makes sense to me. Though I&#8217;m no closer to hitting the gym after watching this ad, I&#8217;m a helluva lot closer to jerking off:</p>
<span class="embed-youtube" style="text-align:center; display: block;"><iframe class="youtube-player" width="640" height="360" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/iYzX5IQzAXc?version=3&#038;rel=1&#038;showsearch=0&#038;showinfo=1&#038;iv_load_policy=1&#038;fs=1&#038;hl=en&#038;autohide=2&#038;wmode=transparent" allowfullscreen="true" style="border:0;" sandbox="allow-scripts allow-same-origin allow-popups allow-presentation"></iframe></span>
<p>(Agency: Fallon Minneapolis)</p>
<p>Part of Equinox&#8217;s new &#8220;Happily Ever&#8221; campaign (shot by fashion fave Ellen von Unwerth), the tag line &#8220;What&#8217;s your after?&#8221; is steering you right toward the fairytale male model-humping storybook life that&#8217;s up for the taking if only you could get your fat ass in a gym.</p>
<p>Those bitches mean business. But not as much business as a bunch of horny art class nuns in corresponding print ad &#8220;Figure Drawing&#8221;&#8230;</p>
<p><img src="https://shapeandcolour.files.wordpress.com/2008/01/equinox.jpg" alt="equinox.jpg" /></p>
<p>These are no ordinary nuns. These are <i>lipstick</i> nuns. And they want some cock.</p>
<p>I don&#8217;t care what any of these ads mean anymore. They&#8217;ve got hot naked people and there no use or even sense in justifying it. That dude&#8217;s ass has inspired me to do some squats. So I guess it all worked out in the end&#8230;</p>
<p><a href="http://www.digg.com"><br />
<img src="https://i0.wp.com/digg.com/img/badges/91x17-digg-button.gif" alt="Digg!" height="17" width="91" /><br />
</a></p>
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